It’s Raining Fuck You’s

January 26, 2010

Guess I’ll type what I meant to type before wanking then sleeping. This weekend has been a hard one on the dating life. Let me check my messages and count the girls who said fuck off:

“i will talk to u in person. just let me know when u are like 5 or 10 away and i will come outside.”
– Right before she said she was going back with her asshole on and off.

“It was nice to meet you but i didnt feel like we clicked. I am sorry.”
– 1 date dark humored girl.

“Well i havent met someone else but i think we want two different things…i am looking for someone who wants to go out with me and develope a relationship and it seems like u want something more casual and thats totally cool but not what i want…i am sorry”
– Large submissive who fell off the map

Me: “well i figure from your silence that you either found someone or are over going out? anyway good luck.”
Her: ” ”
– No response from a girl I canceled once on because I was sick

“things w/ my grandma r getting worse. i’m sorry- need 2 focus on her now. besides, not fair 2 u being canceled on cuz of this situation. i do wish u the best.”
– Girl I’ve never met but been pursuing patiently since September. Finally got a few dates scheduled and she kept canceling.

“Yeah. I’ve been seeing someone”
– Large teacher who I fingered after the 2nd date

“Hey……i have been thinking alot in the past few weeks, and i think i am still not quite ready to date. U seem like a really nice guy. I had a nice time with u. Best of luck to u! :)”
– Bird face but hot. 1 Date. Se La Vi.

“Hey listen, i have hit a huge bump in the road and i wont be dating for a while. Sorry!”
– Girl I never actually met and was sorta over anyway lol

8 fucking girls from Friday to Monday. Oh and to make matters even better this girl I almost fucked but didn’t because she was stage 3 clinger came back after I broke up with her and said she moved in with her new boyfriend to sorta try and rub it in my face. I wished her the best. What a bitch. Didn’t really effect me though since she sucked at head anyway lol.

I was also canceled on on Sunday while waiting at the bar. Which caused me to cancel on the only girl it seems that has stuck around (she’s a bit big).

More Soul Searching

January 19, 2010

Instead of making this post private, I’ve only made private the info I need to keep hidden for now.

I just wanted to have this written down.

Short Term Goals (3-6 months):

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  2. New place to live
  3. Get teeth fixed (it’s more than just hygiene it’s for my heart too)
  4. Work out 60 minutes every other day (every day would be hard)
  5. Better dating prospects (hotter girls with more in common with me)

Long Term Goals (1-2 years):

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  2. Find my own place (need to clear up rent thing with ex first)
  3. Get off all medication (therapy will be needed but I’ll be a better person)
  4. Get to 190 lbs (my ideal weight)
  5. Find a long term girlfriend (who matches or is close to previous list)

That is all.  Good night.

Steps to Happiness?

January 13, 2010

In the interest of time I’ll keep the reasons for this list short. I’m tired of living my life on the down turn. Yeah I’m happy, but I could be a lot happier. Here are my steps that I am going to take to make myself happier:

– When I get healthy, exercise everyday (yeah still sick go fig)
– Find a new place to live and keep it clean
– Make more friends
– Don’t settle with women

So yeah, I’m done settling for 2nd best when I could be having the best life has to offer.

EDIT:  The funny thing about this is because I’ve decided not to settle with women, I’m giving up guaranteed whatever I want sex with a chubby tonight…  Se la vi.

Did I Meet Your Expectations?

January 7, 2010

No dear, you did not. Sorry to put it to you but your half ass attempt at sucking me off was not equal to me tiring myself out trying to get you off.

So I stayed home from work yesterday because I was sick. Lost my voice, the whole shebang. Well, I grew bored of being in bed all day so I decided to venture out and let a girl take care of me. Well, this chick is a BUTTERFACE. If you don’t know what that is GTFO.

Anyway, hot body and all, she still failed epicly in bed. She just laid there and while she was extremely tight (partially due to lack of use due to rape fear), she did not do basically anything. Overall a 4/10 (barely). I’m still sick and her snoring didn’t help.

My Requirements for a Long Term Relationship

December 16, 2009

I take Zoloft.  Have been since I was 15 or so.  Mainly it’s for general anxiety disorder.  But a happy side effect is its defense against my clinical depression.  I missed my dose today.  I switched from taking in the evening to taking in the morning and I left it at home today.  Instead of turning around, I did what any good worker bee would do and go back at lunch to grab it.  I left work today at 8:30 not because I had to work but because I was eating (Pizza Hut Pasta) and watching Anime (Naruto).  I left in the worst mood I’ve been in in a while for no reason.  Got me thinking…  It’s time to ween myself off of Zoloft.  I know it won’t be easy and I won’t be able to do it alone but antidepressants are a band-aid.  It’s time to get to the root of the problem.  I’m going to go see a psychiatrist again and work my way off of all meds.

Yes, I am aware that this has nothing to do with my title, but I wanted to get that out in the open so I have a goal to shoot for.

Now, the way I got over the bad mood was to think about what I want moving forward.  I came to a conclusion.  I want a companion that I can call my equal.  Maybe not get married, but I’m growing rather tired of idiot women who I have no interest in other than to fuck multiple times.

Let me give you a little background on this…  Obviously, I’m divorced.  I’m also not bad looking.  My brother and I look nothing alike but I would say we are both on the same number 1-10 and he pulls model type chicks.  Now granted I could probably do the same if I put the work in, but I tend to go for the easy ones who don’t take a lot of work.  I also don’t have a lot of activities that would put me in front of said women.  So I date online.  Bigger, more desperate, easier to manipulate.  That’s the general rule for online dating.  I grow bored of such games.  I want a challenge…

Another factor going into this is I don’t have a ton of male friends.  Mostly because most of the male friends I made growing up were chased away by my controlling ex.  I was too laid back to do much about it (read:  pussy-whipped), but those times are over.  I work a lot.  Most of my friends now are people I currently or once worked with.  Yeah that’s normal on some levels, but again I usually go home and relax after work.

Those times are over.  I have joined meetup.com and entered some clubs that have the same interests as me.  I’m also a big poker player now which means I’ll meet almost exclusively male friends.  Hell, I’ve already joined a poker club and been in a tourney with them.

A few more notes before I get into the list.  I promised myself when I was growing up that I would have a million dollars in the bank by the time I was thirty.  Of course, I didn’t anticipate being divorced at 29, but I’ve extended this goal to 35 to give me some time to work on my own business.  I don’t like my roommate.  I’ve never had a roommate that didn’t turn out to be a bother.  I’ve made another goal to be living on my own by the time I’m 30.  That gives me a year to save and fix my credit to the point where I can live on my own.  Poker hopefully will help in this regard but I won’t push my luck on that.  I am willing to move states to make this happen.  It will help to save since I plan on living in Japan for 2 years sometime in my life.

I am also tired of being out of shape so yet another goal is (taken cue from the NFL commercials) to do 60 minutes of physical exercise per day.  I used to play basketball 8 days a week and I was in great shape.  It’s time to get back out there.  I just have to shake this pesky winter illness.  Oh and before I forget, I also may have to find a new job soon.  We aren’t profitable on my side of the business.  Time to start searching.

Now to recap the Goals:

– Get off medication
– Find a Long Term Companion
– Million Dollars by 35
– Living alone by 30
– 60 minutes of working out per day
– Maybe New job (if current one goes away)

These aren’t like New Year’s Resolutions.  These are things I have in my heart that will come true.  I’m just listing them out so I can check them off as they come true.

Ok to the list:

MUSTS:
– Looks good in a swimsuit and naked
– Submissive but with an edge
– Obsessed with sex
– Likes games (video/board/cards)
– Likes sports (at least baseball)
– Can be alone without getting needy

DEAL BREAKERS:
– Kids (I don’t want to compete with anyone for their attention)
– Living at home (if their parents can hear the bed creaking then there is a problem)
– No car (get a job please)

I don’t think I’m asking for much.  The submissive might be a little hard to come by, but I’m old-fashioned and my florida friend taught me being dominate is quite fun.  I like having someone who will do anything for me.  I also don’t want someone who will roll over on everything.  I like a little sass sometimes.

Strep to the Throat

December 3, 2009

Holy shit my throat is on fire. Here I am at work in my office wearing a surgical mask so I don’t give this shit to anyone (not required but this shit is contagious). I want to go home but I have so much to do… sigh… Oh and Raider chick got back to me (I was over it anyway but here’s the funny part):

Me: I haven’t heard from you in a while. You over it?
Her: Way over it
Me: wow… ok then…
Me: well thanks for the chance i had fun with you… later

I then proceeded to delete her off IM and mark all her incoming calls/sms msgs to spam so they don’t go to my phone. Raiders suck =)

All Messed Up

November 19, 2009

I came into work today feeling good but as soon as I got in here I got hit with an allergy attack. I even had to take my inhaler which was filled with more dust than my office. Also I got hit with a weird pain yesterday. Feels like gas pains underneth me where I had my surgery. Today It’s in the tip of my dick so I’m gonna make an appt with the DR for STD testing. I highly doubt I have anything but better safe than sorry. I need to make sure I protect Fag Chick. She is becoming more dear to me. I played an ending of Kana Little Sister last night which actually made me tear up. Even though I know the relative ending to all 5 of the endings possible.  I had only seen 2 before I picked the game up again.  It’s strange, how a game labeled as hentai can touch you so well.  The hentai in the game is so minimal it shouldn’t even get the label.  I remember when I first picked it up I thought it was a pure hentai game like True Love, but I was surprised it was more of a soap opera lol.  I highly recommend it as an interactive novel.  Back to work.

A Sport?

November 18, 2009

As I sit here and watch the semi-final of the Tri Nation cup (rugby) I realize exactly how much I like the sport. Not in the OMG I WANT TO PLAY THIS way but the OMG WHAT IS THIS OBSCURE SPORT I SEE AT THE WINTER OLYMPICS way. It also makes me realize how sad it is that I won’t be able to go see it in person in a real way unless I go to a different country. But it all seems to par seeing as I’m planning on living in other countries for at least 5 years or so.

How Fucking Metal?

November 13, 2009

Lots to do this coming week. Tomorrow I have my first in person poker tourney and tomorrow night I have UFC to watch at pops house. Sunday I have D&D with the new DM in a game where we can’t seem to get past a few games per DM (or any games at all as our last failure DM proved). Although I can’t complain on that one seeing as I was partially responsible for him not being there (I pitched in for the keg the night before lol).

I was guilted into seeing the racist latina family girl tonight. I need to keep up the relationship in order to continue doing business with her company. Oh well, maybe I can get some head out of it but I doubt it. I basically said I’m going to be playing games come over and watch. She bought it and will be coming at 8. Double sigh. I hope she gets the point eventually.

Biker Fag chick wants to step up our frequency of seeing each other from once a week to twice a week. She’s starting to fall pretty hard for me so I agreed (more sex). She also wants to experiment but we always end up missionary (sigh).

So here I am at work not wanting to be here. This week I’ve been so tired I haven’t even wanted to come in. I killed it yesterday by saving the company money but still…

Next Friday I’m going to go see Dethklok and Mastadon at the Palladium in Hollywood. $34 to see a fictional band. Go figure. Here’s the funny part though, to get the discount from 50 to 34 I had to get a fourth person to go. Guess who stepped up?

My father.

That’s right, my pops is gonna go to a death metal concert.

How fucking metal is that?

I showed him the music and he liked it.

COFFEE IS METAL!

Nathan is no sell out!

Funny part is, I didn’t even know what Dethklok was until I went to Texas and saw Metalocalypse for the first time 2 weeks ago.

Raiders Suck

November 9, 2009

Things were going well with this “full figured” girl I’ve seen 2x. I invited her over to my place and we dry humped etc. She wanted to have sex but in a change of events she all of the sudden didn’t. I called her on it. She came and she thought twice about it. She tried to deny it but she couldn’t. LOL

Later that night I dropped her off at her aunt’s house and she asked me to come inside. Now I had been having fun with her by not driving with hands and stuff so I was in a playful mood. Her family (rather large family) was playing blackjack so I joined in. Taunts were issued back and forth and I saw the dealer had a Raider hat on. Now what I said next would normally be taken with a grain of sand from any other person I said this to, but something to note…

This family is mexican.

That should about set the scene for what happened next. I said and I quote, “Oh Raider fan huh? I won’t hold that against you.”

The entire table got deathly quiet then erupted in drunken shouts (some playful some not so much). They taunted me relentlessly until I gave them the fact that I didn’t have a team and they continued saying I was trying to dig myself out.

I didn’t read too much into it. Until 10 minutes later when the dealing Raider hat guy went outside so I said I would deal in his absense. The drunken aunt who owned the place said:
“We wait.”
“No it’s ok, I’ll use my chips to cover.”
“We wait. Don’t get me annoyed little boy.”

Now it was at this point I started to get upset. But being a gentleman I released the deck and sat down. Then came the closer that I almost started shouting at her for…

“Good boy.”

Now… There are only a few things in this world I can’t stand:

1) Over the top Racists
2) Bullies
3) Felons
4) Girls who use marriage as a form of control

Now turns out the aforementioned aunt is 2 of those 4. A racist and a bully. My full figured friend brought a white guy into a racist lioness’ den. Apparently at least 3 people at that table have a real problem with white people. Now, one is entitled to their own opinion about anything but when they stop being civil, it’s time to throwdown.

Course I did none of these things. I got pissed off and left the table quietly and politely. My female friend was tired so I offered to take her home. She had been informed by someone who fled the table after the fiasco exactly what happened. She wanted to bail. I was game so I left with her. She needed something from inside or to say good night or whatever so I started the car. When she came out she was shadowed by a beer carrying Raider hat mexican dealer. He then asked me why I was being a pussy and getting offended. I said politely that I was taking the girl home. He said, “Next time know the situation before you open your mouth to people you don’t know about the Raiders.”

I literally had to stop myself from getting out of the car. I shook his hand, said goodnight, and was on my way.

So to sum up everything:

Fuck the Raiders
Fuck their butthurt fans
Fuck racists
and Fuck this girl I’m done.